9 Signs You’re a Gluten-Free Traveller
1. You have tried to say the words ‘gluten-intolerant’ in multiple languages
The keyword here is tried. You sat down confidently saying the words “sa-n-za gloo-tie-n” a little too loudly at every restaurant on the Amalfi Coast. Then, a few months later, your Italian friend explained you were pronouncing the words completely wrong. Every time.
2. You regularly exceed baggage allowance, and it’s normally because of snacks
Opening your bag in front of customs has become a nightmare. Sometimes it feels like sneaking cocaine across the border would be easier than explaining to the customs officer why you have four boxes of Naked bars, two packets of rice cakes, half a dozen apples, carrots and a jar of hummus weighing you down.
3. You get overly excited when you spot meals on the menu you can eat
You get an even more intense feeling of excitement when you stumble across an English menu in a foreign country with easy to read (GF), (DF) and (V) markings. Sometimes you even start taking photos and embracing all the hashtags, right down to #instafood.
#Everyone #Must #Know.
4. You have experienced the awkward ‘what happens when you eat gluten?’ question from strangers
And you have actually explained it – mostly to people you don’t like.
5. You have experienced ‘the blank stare’
Most of the time it feels like nobody knows what gluten is. Sometimes while explaining you question if you even understand what gluten is. This has led to you describing gluten in weird ways, or hearing gluten described in weird ways. From it’s a protein, to allergy, to wheat, to bread to “for the love of God no pasta please”.
6. You get defensive about being Gluten-Intolerant
Especially when restaurants try to sneak gluten into your food and pretend it’s not there. You have learned the hard way many people don’t believe gluten-intolerance is a real condition. They have tried to argue with you that unless you are a celiac, your body was made to break down wheat and that humans have been doing it for thousands of years. You have had people from multiple countries explain to you that gluten-free cooking is just some new ‘FAD’.
7. You have accidentally eaten gluten and subsequently reached a new level of friendship with your travel buddy
This friend no longer needs to be told what happens when you eat gluten. They’ve heard you moan about it. Especially when trapped in a twin share room on an eight-day sailing trip. From “my tummy’s bloated” to “I have a headache” to “my jeans won’t do up” to “I just feel ill why won’t you pity me?” If this friend makes it past you being glutened, you know they’re a keeper.
8. You have secretly resented the “Oh My God I’m gluten-intolerant too” girl
Half the time, she’s actually eating a sandwich as she says it. Then she usually follows up with, “but you know, I still just eat it of course.” This has helped you to master the polite smile and nod, however – because you understand everyone’s body is different.
9. You instantly became best friends with another gluten-intolerant traveler
The moment you saw them perusing that gluten-free menu your eyes locked. You may as well have created a joint calendar right then and there. You instantly started discussing hipster cafes and figuring out which meals you can share. Lady and the Tramp anyone?
